Super Buster - Issue #1 - Super Buster Begins

Twenty years ago, W.A.S.P Headquarters, New Mexico.
Agent Steve is looking at the blinking dot at the computer’s screen.
-Hey, Larson! – He says.
-What? – Said Larson coming closer and holding a bottle of beer.
-What’s this blinking red dot near Earth?
-It must be just another meteor.
-Should we warn the commander?
-Nope.
-What if it hits a city?
-We still have… What? Fifteen minutes?
-Hey, dude… I don’t think this is a meteor…
-What else it could be?
-See the frequencies? I think it is cosmic shit!
-Cosmic Shit?! Commander!!!
***
Gerald Barlo and his wife, Mary, live in a small town named Littlespring. They were eating some cookies when a big noise came from the living room.
-What was that? – Asked Mary.
Then, they heard a strange sound. It looked like a baby crying. When they went to the living room, they found a baby in the middle of the blazing fireplace. Gerald hurried and took him out of there.
-My God! – Said him. – Is this a baby?
-No, it’s a horse, you dumbass! Is he alright?
Gerald looked to the baby. He was okay, no burns and no injuries.
-Where did you come from?
The baby looked to him and gently touched his nose. Then he pressed it and a cracking sound was heard.
***
Gareth “Gary” Barlo grew up knowing that was different from the other kids. He was a very smart boy and had some optic difficulties without glasses. When he was four years old, he was bitten by a large dog on the street. The next day, all his injuries had been gone. His only friend was an Indian boy named Jakob. They would always spend the day playing videogames and reading comic books. Once they tried to watch pornography, but they lived in dark times with bad internet connection and no 3G.
Gary may be an intelligent boy. But sometimes, when he stops thinking about biology, astrology, cientology, physicology, chemisterology and other invented ologies, he would reveal supernatural powers. When he asked his mother about his powers origins, she would say that it was a gift from Heavens. When he asked his father about his powers origins, the man would tell a long and boring story about his nose (it was so boring that if I write it here they’ll accuse me of torture and cruelty).
(You must be wondering when Super Buster is going to appear. Shut up and let me tell the fucking story.)
Five years ago, Gary was returning from school by walking (the other kids didn’t let him into the bus because he was wearing no shoes (he wasn’t wearing shoes because the other kids stole it from him)). Then he got home. And nothing significant happened on the way back home. But he decided to go talk to his father about his powers. Gerald Barlo, Gary’s dad, was watching TV with Mary when the boy came in.
-Hey, dad… - Said Gary. – I wanted to talk to you about my powers.
-Okay. – Said his father. – It all started fifteen years ago…
-No, dad! – He said. – I don’t want to know about your nose. What’s the real deal about all these weird things I can do? And don’t you say it was a gift from Heavens!
-Okay. – Said Gerald. – I think it’s time for you to know.
-Gerald… - Said Mary. – Are you sure?
-Yes. Look, Gary. – Gerald looked deep into his son’s eyes. – There’s a reason why you can do all this. But we have no idea of what reason it could be.
Gary looked to his father, and then to his mother.
-You mean… - He said. – That all this time… You guys were hiding this from me?
-It’s a big shock, I know. But it’s the truth.
-It looks like I don’t even know you… I mean… Are you really my father?
-We found you in the fireplace and decided to adopt you because that’s what normal couples do.
-It can’t be…
-Gary… We tried to tell you… But we didn’t know how to explain something that we don’t know.
-Wait a second… You guys said I was at the fireplace?
-Yep.
-I didn’t crash through any windows, did I?
-Nope.
-That means that I’ve must have come from…
-Heaven? – Asked Mary.
-Not exactly. From the sky! I must be an alien!
-Don’t you be ridiculous! Aliens don’t have hair!
-Don’t you guys understand? If I investigate other incidents like this, I might discover where I came from!
-Are you planning on travelling around the world?
-No. I was thinking about using a computer. But that may work too. – He smiled with the new opportunity. – That’s it! I will search for my home and… - Then he remembered his parents.
Mary and Gerald were holding hands and smiling, proud of their adoptive son.
-Mom, dad… - He said. – You were the most fantastic parents ever. But I must do it…
Gary opened the door the next day and left to the world. The journey was just starting.
***
Gary Barlo travelled through the whole world. He started with Roswell, and then Nome, New York, London, Paris, Cairo, Naples, Berlin, Moscow, Rostov, Tehran, Beijing, Buenos Aires, Rio, Sao Paulo, La Paz, Santiago and Tokyo.
***
Some weeks ago, Tokyo, Japan.
It was night in the city. Bright advertisements covered the tall buildings. In a small sushi bar at the poor side of the metropolis, Gary eats his meal when a Japanese man put a hand on his shoulder.
-We don’t like Americans here. – He said in a strong accent.
-Hideshi! Watashitachi no ishō o ijitte tomeru!(Stop messing with our costumer!) – Said the man preparing the sushi.
-<He’s just a fucking American!> - Said Hideshi.
-<I don’t care! He could be a prostitute! He is paying!>
-Any problem here? – Asked Gary.
-Yes… YOU! –
Hideshi punched Gary’s face and a crack was heard. His hand was broken, but Gary’s face was intact. One scared client got a revolver and aimed at Gary.
-Kuso… What are you?! – He shouted.
Hideshi fell on the floor holding the twisted hand.
-<Stay away from me, abnormal!>
-<I didn’t intend to hurt you!> - Said Gary.
That’s when he realized everyone had run away.
He walked on the streets of Tokyo. It has been five years since he left home to discover his origin and the only thing he found was Cleopatra’s Tomb, King Solomon’s Mines and Elvis Presley.
He decided to enter in a restaurant. It was a good place to drink something. He went to the balcony and ordered some soda. The barman realized he was feeling horrible.
-American, huh? – He asked.
-Yup.
-Why are you here?
-I came here looking for my origins…
-They all come.
-Really?
-No. Why are you so sad?
-Because I’m different from other people.
-There’s nothing wrong with being different. I have a cousin that has ten piercings in the forehead and green hair.
-But you guys are Japanese.
-And you are American.
-I guess you’re right. But I’m not feeling any better.
The barman handed a glass containing a mysterious liquid to Gary.
-Drink this. – He said. – Don’t ask me what’s in there.
Gary drank some of the unknown liquid. Suddenly, the whole place looked brighter and a jukebox at the corner started playing Gangnam Style. Every single client got up and started to dance. Elvis Presley got closer to Gary.
-Elvis! – He said.
-Hey, Gary! – Said Elvis. – Still looking for your origin?
-Yeah! What are you doing here in Japan?
-I came for this party, man!
Gary got up, the music playing loud.
HEYYYYYY…
SEXY LADY…
He spotted Natalie Portman in the middle of the dancing crowd and started to dance with her.
-Hey, Gary! – She said.
-Natalie Portman! You are here for the party too?
-Of course! Ain’t any party like a Jack Nicholson party!
Then he saw Jack Nicholson dancing tango with Clint Eastwood.
-Jack Nicholson?! Clint Eastwood?!
-Hey, Gary! – Said Jack.
-What are you doing here in this party?!
-This is my party, man!
Gary looked around and saw Neil Patrick Harris with Jonah Hill and Chloe Moretz. Then he saw Brad Pitt dancing with Johnny Depp and Tim Burton. Jerry Bruckheimer was crying in the corner.
-Hey, Gary. – Said Clint Eastwood. – I’ve heard that you’re looking for your origins.
-Yeah, man. I’ve been looking for it for five years!
-Why don’t you go on and have a word with the oracle.
-The oracle?
-Oprah! – He shouted.
Oprah Winfrey came to Gary.
-Oprah, I’m looking for my origins. – Said Gary.
-Forget your origins and dance!
-That’s a good advice!
Then they all started to dance to Gangnam Style.
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They were all dancing when Natalie Portman kissed Gary and he saw himself in front of the gates of eternal knowledge.
-Are you going in? – Asked Adam Sandler.
Gary opened the gates and was blinded by a bright light.
-Gary Barlo… - Said Ellen Mclain’s voice. – You have been looking for your origins for five years… Now you will find it… Go to the north side of Tokyo and find the man known as Baka. He will help you in your journey…
Then Gary saw himself back in the restaurant. He was lying on the floor, there was no party and the barman was looking at him.
-Wow. – Said Gary.
-I’m thinking about selling it, what do you think?
Gary went away running to the North side of Tokyo.
-Hey, you forgot to pay! – Said the Barman.

Continues…